The Targ Fang Incident






 Captain Burgundy Jenssen Warrior Bard (13700) Time: 14.04.2010 - 00:56

Approximate Stardate 200912.04

Jenssen had spent several months under the watchful protection of the THE KLINGON EMPIRE. Her worlds had grown in economic scale, boosted by the sudden disappearance of two of the Members of the House of Mathias right next to her Alpha Tau Colonies causes some suspicions. After repeated attempts to contact Kthor’la- 13242 and K’kuzus’sogh-16594 via subspace, J’Ssen’la and Grewell took the newly constructed Naussicaan class ship IKT Whirlaway to drop in for a visit. Upon finding the colonies deserted, J’Ssen contacted Mathias and Kor for permission to recover all goods available on the colonies. She successfully collected enough materials to start construction of a second desert planet, Pavane. She and Grewell were traveling back to Alpha Tau when they happened to stop at a local Space Station and take a seat at the bar. By chance Tor'Chaajla - House of Tor - =Klingon Empire= was also at the bar and in the middle of a verbal joust with a Cadet JJ-F.C.R.-. J’Ssen and Grewell sat at the edge of the bar watching the banter escalate until J’Ssen knew JJ was going to be in a world of hurt if he continued on his current attempts to make Tor’Cha lose his temper.

"Whadda mean I can’t call you Torch?...That’s lot easier then Tor'Chaajla - House of Tor - =Klingon Empire=." The young cadet was mocking the half-Vulcan, half-Klingon who sat composed at the bar working on a datapad.

"My name is Tor’Cha and it was honorably given to me. You WILL use it correctly." Tor’Cha patiently explained to the young Cadet, who was obviously a little too drunk to notice how close he was to tempting his own fate with this argument.

"Greetings noble Tor’Cha. Is this cadet bothering you?" J’Ssen spoke in a fluid voice that carried over the din of conversations in the bar. The crowd paused, looking to see the three individuals spouting colors of the THE KLINGON EMPIREconverged close to JJ. Those bar patrons closest to JJ slowly and strategically backed away knowing this was not a good sign.

"Ah, Hello dear J'Ssen. No this petaQ’ is of no bother. I’m just about to take care of it." Tor’Cha replied without a hint of expression as he instantly he grabbed JJby the leg, fished a small pouch out of his breast pocket of his armor and rammed a Targ fang through JJ’s foot.

The young Cadet JJshrieked and fell off his chair, rolling on the floor holding his foot. "Aw-aw-aw-aw! Medic!"

"Oh, that’s gotta hurt." J'Ssen looked down with a hint of concern at the young cadet. "You can't say he didn’t warn you. Never insult a Klingon. I figured your mother would have told you that long ago." J'Ssen sat down without a pause and ordered a drink with Grewell, ignoring what had become a common place scene where ever she was around Klingons. In reality, this was mild compared to much of what she had already seen.

"I will see you later dear J’Ssen. I have a new recruit, lady Ka'Ra'la - House of Tor =Klingon Empire=who has joined my House. I must help her attend to a budding new colony. I bid your good evening." Tor’Cha remarked as he stood and left the bar, leaving JJ wallowing and howling in pain on the floor.

"Good night noble Tor’Cha." J’Ssen smiled at him as he passed her, knowing he of all Klingons was one she could call a friend.

J’Ssen peered down at JJ and remarked as a young Vulcan named Fleet Admiral Fischer<38>attended to his wound with an emergency medkit. "Better use a good dose of anti-venom with that. Ever seen the damage a timber rattler can do to a human’s arm? Well I have...Targ Fangs are just as poisonous. You better treat it carefully if you don’t want to lose that foot."

"I’m half Romulan and have cybornetic components, but this foot isn't one of them." JJ squeaked still clutching his foot as Fischer injected him with anti-venom. His face began to quickly swell and his eye bulged. "AHHH, I’m allergic to bee-stings! JJ croaked as his face and neck began to swell twice their normal size."

"And you are apparently allergic to Trag’s Venom too." Jenssen looked on with a little concern as Fleet Admiral Fischer<38> quickly selected the appropriate medications to prevent the allergic reaction from growing worse. Fischer then used a dermal regenerator on the wound through JJ's foot. She placed the Targ Fang in a sample cup which JJ quickly grabbed as a souvenir.

"Half-Romulan you say? Sorry didn’t catch your name there lad." J’Ssen absently replied.

"Jordan, JJ for short." The young cadet beamed.

"Well then, Jolan Tru JJ." J’Ssen replied looking down her nose a little bit at the drunk cadet. "And you are a member of which Alliance?"

"I’m in FCR..." JJ replied puffing his chest out and slowly, standing up and testing his newly repaired foot. "Thanks Fleet Admiral Fischer<38>."

Fischer nodded and returned to her quiet corner in the bar to study her data pad.

JJ pulled up a chair beside J’Ssen and resumed his conversation barely missing a beat. "Well I still think I should call him Torch next time I meet him. Yeah he’s a Torch alright...and're not a Klingon, why you dressed like one and hanging around with the likes of them?" JJ studied J’Ssen carefully to see she was indeed Human.

"First of all, I believe Tor’Cha requested you not call him Torch and what I am doing 'hanging around with the Klingons' is my business." J’Ssen absently replied trying to get JJ to not talk someone behind his back.

"Really? You love Torchman then, do ya?" JJ leaned against J’Ssen’s, shoulder looking up at her with puppy-dog eyes and batting them at her, still two sheets to the wind.

Fast as a jaguar, J’Ssen grabbed him by the neck and rocked him back over her leg, took the targ Fang off her boot and gabbed it through his other foot.

"You don’t learn real fast do you. Never insult a Klingon." J'Ssen smartly remarked as she finished up her drink in one gulp, slapped down a few credits for the bar keeper and nodded to Grewell. She and Grewell exited the establishment as the other patrons just stared in shock at the sight of a Human behaving completely as a Klingon would.

"AW-aw-aw-aw- Medic!" JJ cried out from the floor again.

Jenssen was sure JJ would be fine and perhaps wise up a little before he seriously got injured insulting the wrong type of Klingon. Both she and Tor’Cha were more likely to treat him like a ‘bat around cat toy’ instead of killing outright for his insults. Jenssen smiled to herself at the Lad’s insolence as Grewell and she beamed back up to the IKT Whirlaway and headed for home. J’Ssen was sure she would see a lot more of Cadet JJ -F.C.R.-in the future.






Part Two:   Hailing J'Ssen .... Open Subspace Call in Chat



From: Captain Burgundy Jenssen Warrior Bard (13700) Time: 14.04.2010 - 01:43
 J’Ssenla House of Mathias =Klingon Empire= was sitting on the bridge of the Whirlaway directing typical routine colony duties when an urgent message was intercepted over a broadcast open Subspace channel.

"Captain, there is an urgent message being broadcast over open subspace channels for you. The message seems to be coming from an area around the Federation of Conservative Republicsterritories. It’s highly irregular in content." T’Laurn was reading the incoming message with a raised eyebrow at the content, "Audio only."

J’Ssen turned to look at her Vulcan friend with a shrug, "Ok, play it I guess."

T’Laurn nodded, opening the channel to the audio on the bridge. The message played out.

"(Erie'Riov) Lieutenant JJ Version 3.1-FC.R.-to J’Ssen, please come in J’Ssen....I really need your help! I need a name. J’Ssen are you there?" The young voice she had just recently met over a targ fang incident at the bar just a few days ago was on the other end of the comm channel.

"Is the source still open T’Laurn?" J’Ssen asked, puzzled by what this young cadet meant by needing a name.

"Yes Captain, the source shows open, connecting the link." T’Laurn nodded.

"This is Captain J’Ssenla House of Mathias =Klingon Empire, go ahead JJ. What do you mean by needing a name?" J’Ssen replied with a questioning look on her face.

"Oh there you are, Jolan Tru J'Ssen! I really need a good name for something I’m working on." (Erie'Riov) Lieutenant JJ Version 3.1-FC.R.- responded sounding very hopeful on the other end of the comm. Channel. "And I though you would be the best one to ask for it."

"What kind of name? For what? A ship?" J’Ssen queried again.

"No, not a BAR!" JJ’s excitement beamed over the comm channel.

J’Ssen laughed, "Sure JJ. What about the Rusty Hull? Or Leaky Plasma Chamber?"

" it’s gotta be really good." JJ insisted.

"Spent Photons?" J’Ssen suggested.

"Naw better then that." JJ insisted.

"The Targ’s Fang?" J’Ssen raised an eyebrow at the suggestion.

"Ooooh....I like that...Targ’s Fang...Hmmm maybe not that, it’s too painful...hmmm...Oh I got it! I got it! The Targ’s Head! Yeah, that’s it...Thanks J’Ssen, I knew you were the one to ask!" JJ quickly closed the channel before J’Ssen could even get in a last word.

"Your Welcome...I think." J’Ssen shugged into dead space.

"Seems he likes you." Jrell, the big boyish-Bolian mumbled from the helm.

"Oh hush Jrell....Well, I guess I did sort of leave an ‘impression’ on the lad. I guess we’ll just have to plan to drop in and see his new bar some day." J’Ssen smiled, knowing she would be seeing a lot more of (Erie'Riov) Lieutenant JJ Version 3.1-FC.R.- in the future.





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